How Your Shyness Personality Is Formed From Your Family Life
Shyness is sometimes associated with our genes or even learned behavior. However, everyone can agree how important family is and how they shape us as people. There are many incidents within our family that can cause shyness among our family members. If your parents were the kind that made statements or expressions such as, “Children should be seen and not heard”. You may have grown up feeling that what you had to say was not important. Usually, this expression would come after being disorderly and it may have been that it was your parents’ way of quieting you down so as not to cause embarrassment for them.
Additionally, if your siblings were always teasing you, calling you names or telling you that sometimes say the stupidest things, you may have discovered to just keep your thoughts to yourself. Another way that may promote shyness is that you were teased by other kids because you didn’t wear the latest brand name clothing or even wore hand me downs from your siblings. Kids can be cruel and if you were teased, this too could cause shyness or feelings of inferiority.
Our family is very important to us and therefore, can be very powerful in how we think and feel about certain incidents and situations. Sometimes, what your family thinks or tells you about yourself, helps to mold your personality. As you grow into adulthood, many of these incidents you have experienced or even some of the painful comments that have been made to or about you during your childhood can affect your future emotional health and well being.
Because your siblings or parents may not have had time for you which may have caused you to spend a lot of time alone this could have resulted in you becoming introverted. What’s also important to note that if you had several siblings, it may have been simpler to just have them as friends rather than make the effort to initiate friendships with others outside your family unit. Because of you being comfortable with your family, you may have stayed home more than you would have liked all the while increasing dependability on your family.
Believe it or not an only child is more likely to be more outgoing than a child with siblings because they had no one else at home to play with. If you depended on your brothers and sisters to be your friends, it may have been difficult for you to learn how to form new relationships with other children.
Even if you came from a very supportive family if you have always depended on them for company, you may still be shy around other people because you don’t know them as well as your family members. As you become an adult your siblings may still be your only friends. Maybe one way to make new friends could be to go out with one of your siblings in order to feel more comfortable, but then each of you can try to make new friends in a social setting.
If you become dependent on your family for all your social needs, it will become extremely more difficult for you to seek out others in social settings. It’s important for you to consider taking some time out to meet new people. You can take a continuing education course for adults, volunteer; join a fitness or book club where you can become comfortable with people other than your family members. These suggestions can help you cope with your introvertism and shyness if you will only make the effort.
You can probably analyze some situations in your childhood that may have contributed to your shyness. The issue now is trying to figure out solutions that can assist you to become more outgoing or at least be able to manage your shyness triggers. Some of the solutions offered consist of initiating conversation with people. Every time you find yourself starting a conversation with someone, you will find it easier to do the next time. Your confidence will grow and you will start to realize that you can be more sociable and your shyness will become less prevalent.
Tagged with: cure • extreme shyness • get over shyness • overcome shyness • overcoming shyness • shy • shyness • social anxiety • social phobia
Filed under: Shyness
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